How do I pick just one?? Okay possibly the last attempt at a lame joke for this post but it had to be done because I am just plain uncomfortable talking about my highlight reel. On paper I have a lot of accomplishments but I know the dark back story to all of those things and the awards don’t seem as shiny when you know the sacrifice made for them. No negative Nancy today though! Today is about moments in the sun.
One of my favorite moments had nothing to do with grades or relationships, locations or family ties. It is all about me. I have dealt with my share of self esteem and self worth issues to where the image I had of myself in my head and the person I saw in the mirror just did not match.
But that all changed when I got sick. Strangely enough, focusing solely on my health and getting better caused me to look at myself differently. I spent 6 months in my head re-evaluating what I wanted for myself once this trial was over. I didn’t so much want to see beauty when I looked in the mirror but I just wanted to truly see myself. And as I spent more and more time with myself and finding value in just who I am, I began to love me. Even with a colostomy and severely underweight I looked in the mirror and smiled at her. She was worth getting well for, she was definitely worth another 60 years or more, and she was worth the life I get to lead post treatment.
Nothing is perfect and truthfully sometimes I still get down on myself BUT I don’t stay there. I am worth another look in the mirror.